Turning 30

Today is my 30^th birthday. This is apparently a fairly significant milestone, especially for a woman. But when I sat down to think about this it feels like it is more about what others think of this. There is a pre-conceived notion that ‘it’s all down hill from here’. You have to have your life settled on its track, your health will deteriorate, you have no choice left but to live with the hand you have been dealt. I call BS. What a load of rubbish that is. My life isn’t over, I feel like it is just in a new chapter with so many exciting things on the horizon. And I am happy with the previous chapters too. I have no regrets, and any that I might have had, I have let go of and I don’t dwell on them because really what good would that do.

I am living every bit of the life I always imagined, only better. And that’s not to say that I don’t have much of an imagination, but that I have made decisions in life that have led me to be where I want to be.

I had a happy and easy childhood, I studied and have 2 university degrees, I’ve worked hard, I am married to the love of my life, I have 2 healthy and utterly adorable children, I’m not in debt, I’ve traveled across the world, I’ve lived in another country, I’m healthy, I’m happy and I’m learning and doing new things all the time.

I’m 30 and I don’t lie about my age, I’m proud of it. There is no air brushing here. My freckles are a mark of my sunshine filled days, my **gasp** wrinkles show that I have smiled a lot. I’m not perfect and I am ok with that.

I don’t compare myself to others. With the growing proliferation of social media everyone’s life seems to be on display and some people feel envy or isolation because of this. I have a self confessed minor obsession with observing other peoples lives but I don’t feel envy or isolation. It’s the opposite of that. I enjoy seeing others happiness and it encourages me to be happy. I think that happiness is contagious and it is a good thing that we can share it so easily now.

I was going to write a fairly clichéd list of 30 life lessons I have learnt in my 30 years but decided to just mention a couple that I think are important.

HAPPINESS That’s what it is all about. It isn’t much of a life if you aren’t happy. You need to focus what you do and be sure it is contributing to your happiness. You can’t buy it, you can’t define it, you can just live life in a way that supports it. And while I don’t advocate dedicating your life to making others happy to the detriment of yourself, I do think it is important to contribute to others happiness in a meaningful way. It may be small gestures but as I said above, happiness is contagious and by making someone else feel good you will feel good yourself. I suppose the biggest challenge is figuring out what makes you happy, but you are on your own with that one.

 

GROWTH Never stop learning, this is how we grow, and if you aren’t growing you are dying. This may seem a little blunt but it’s the truth, another thing I believe is important. My advice is to stop saying “I should” and just go ahead and do it.

 

BE PRESENT It is important to live life for the moment. Take away the past, don’t dwell on regrets or let yourself suffer for what has already happened and cannot be changed. Don’t aim too far ahead of yourself or you won’t notice what is happening around you right now. Be happy with this moment, right now. If you aren’t happy, change it.

And a few final words just because it’s my birthday and I can:

• Your health is important
• Your job doesn’t define you
• Have passion in your life
• Not everyone has to like you & you don’t have to like everyone
• Learn to say no – you don’t have to do everything
• Not everything has to be perfect
• Forgiveness (for the big and the little things) will free you up to move forward in life
• Trust your gut feeling – it’s right most of the time

Hip Hooray to me! Have you got any good life lessons you’d like to share? Have you had a milestone birthday and felt any different, because I don’t think I do.